Hello God it's me again:
I know you haven't heard from me in quite awhile....."WHAT" Oh yeah that was me 5 days ago cussing and yelling at you your right....but that was the sick me. The me who was sick of being sick. The me who thought life was unfair, who wished you would turn back the clock to Oct 6th 2008 and let me make a different choice that day in hopes that I don't get hit by a "WITCH" who ran a red light and hurt me so badly my life changed forever while she walked away unscathed. Yeah that was me your right. BUT this me the one who is talking to you today is saying THANK YOU. For what ever reason my last 3 days and now today have been very good days. I haven't had the headaches and I haven't had the sick tummy. So I've been a happier me, one my family and I like. I know my family wasn't enjoying the other me Heck I wasn't enjoying the other me hence the yelling and cussing I did the other day to you. I really HATED the other me so much so I wanted to END the other me. In away you did end the other me. I went to bed 5 night ago after yelling and cussing at you and I cried and I begged and I pleaded 'PLEASE PLEASE LET ME HAVE SOME GOOD DAYS" I told you I didn't like me sick all the time and I said if you would just let me have some good days I would make the best of them. You did and I have ......so far. So Again:
Hello God it'd me again:
The good me, the not always sick me, the me who can handle the pain somewhat better than before me. and I want to say again THANK YOU FOR LISTENING AND GRANTING MY WISH. I also want to ask if at all possible if we can keep going like this for awhile more. Everyone including myself likes this me. I'm not crabby, I'm not bitchy. I can actually do stuff. Yes your right I still have to deal with not walking very well, but I can now handle that because I feel better about the rest of myself. I am enjoying each and everyday not cowering in a corner crying. So if you please lets keep this going I LIKE THIS ME. Amen.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
The day is coming closer
The day is coming closer...its a day I dread with all my heart! My beloved Pumpkin is coming to the end of his life. He is around 15 or 16 years old. I really don't remember for sure as it seems we had him forever. The biggest part of loosing him is that once again I will feel the loss of Puff. Pumpkin and Puff were the best of friends in cat world. Where one went the other followed I couldnt go to the bathroom with out both being in there with me. AND BED whoo let me tell you Puff was on my head and Pumpkin on my feet. When Puff died Pumpkin took over the job of sleeping on my head. When I was still able to sit at my desk and desktop computer I actually had to have a second computer chair for those two to sit in. And when I would be relaxing in my recliner or on the couch I had two furry babies right along side of me one one either side. When Puff died Pumpkin looked so lost I wanted to get another cat right away. Mr Gab vetoed that idea. It was 7 months after he passed when Mr Gab himself brought home Lucky. Pumpkin didn't like him at all!
And it took almost 4 months for them to become friends and be together not as close as Puff and him were but close enough. Now that Pumpkin is getting to that point neither cat wants anything to do with the other. In fact I have to watch Lucky because he will hurt Pumpkin on purpose. I know his passing is part of life but I hate it.. 100% HATE IT!
I have entertained the idea of when he has passed and I have done my grieving I will think about instead of adding another cat I will add a dog.
We used to always have 2 dogs 2 cats at the same time before. Then we had to downsize when we came to care for dad. Now as we get into our next phase of pets I think 1 and 1 would be a great idea.
I love my pets.....they arent just pets to us they are our kids our babies our lives. We just cant see our life without a pet in it. And so it goes One door closes another opens.
I just wish I had more time
And it took almost 4 months for them to become friends and be together not as close as Puff and him were but close enough. Now that Pumpkin is getting to that point neither cat wants anything to do with the other. In fact I have to watch Lucky because he will hurt Pumpkin on purpose. I know his passing is part of life but I hate it.. 100% HATE IT!
I have entertained the idea of when he has passed and I have done my grieving I will think about instead of adding another cat I will add a dog.
We used to always have 2 dogs 2 cats at the same time before. Then we had to downsize when we came to care for dad. Now as we get into our next phase of pets I think 1 and 1 would be a great idea.
I love my pets.....they arent just pets to us they are our kids our babies our lives. We just cant see our life without a pet in it. And so it goes One door closes another opens.
I just wish I had more time
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Where is my 5 year old grandson?
Where is little man? I need him quick......this is AN EMERGENCY!
Our recorder is set to record nothing but spongbob squarepants! and I cant change it. I need a 5 year old to fix it for me.......
OH WAIT.......................
I DID ASK A 5 YEAR OLD TO HELP ME FIX IT.......................................................
THATS WHY ITS ALL SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS RECORDINGS NOW! lol
Ok then I need a smarter someone to help me stop all the spongebob recording....after all I'd like to record a show or two myself...and NOT SPONGEBOB. I need a drink...ya'll can find me in kitchen...............
Our recorder is set to record nothing but spongbob squarepants! and I cant change it. I need a 5 year old to fix it for me.......
OH WAIT.......................
I DID ASK A 5 YEAR OLD TO HELP ME FIX IT.......................................................
THATS WHY ITS ALL SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS RECORDINGS NOW! lol
Ok then I need a smarter someone to help me stop all the spongebob recording....after all I'd like to record a show or two myself...and NOT SPONGEBOB. I need a drink...ya'll can find me in kitchen...............
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Memories
So the other day Mr Gab brought home donuts......usually that doesn't bother me I let grand kids eat them as their treat. But then he told me there was a donut that had slivered almonds on top. Right away memories of dad and I sharing one of those donuts flooded me and I asked him to bring me that donut. He asked if I was sure as I had been trying to eat healthier but I just had to have that donut. I said yes.
As I sat there eating that donut the cat sleeping on my chest woke up and started grabbing for pieces of donut. I said "Hey you dumb cat donuts aren't good for cats!" But he kept trying to get some anyways.
And I didn't count on his paws being faster than my hands pushing him away as he managed to grab some right outta my mouth! and every single little piece that dropped on my shirt he snapped up like he hadn't eaten in 6 months.
After I was done I sat there thinking of all the times I ate one of those donuts with my dad.Most of the time I would be at work with dad and we'd share his lunch when we got to the donut he would pull out his pocket knife and cut the said donut in half and give me my half. Now in my memories of these times something flashed in my head..........that pocket knife!!!!!! OMG dad used that knife on everything. He would use it to gap the spark plugs on his car. He would scrap off the corrosion of the battery in the car. he would dig out slivers in his hand and or fingers he also would use it to pop open any thing that had pus in. good god the things he used that pocket knife for and for the most part all he did was take out his handkerchief and wipe it off and god only knows what he used the Handkerchief for!!!! Then the next memory that came for said pocket knife was the time I washed dads pants......I was standing in the basement and I was going through his pockets and I got to the one with his pocket knife in.....it had screws....nails....washers.....dirt.....greasy something......dirt..........pocket knife.....more dirt......saw dust........coin purse.....loose coins! I pulled it all out and put it all on the kitchen table we had in the basement just for this purpose and then dropped the pants into the washer. I then went over to dad's work bench and grabbed the bucket and carried it to the table. There I took out the coins and coin purse and his pocket knife and the rest I pushed into that bucket. I carried it back to dad's work bench so it was there next time he was down there working. I would put loose coins in my pocket and carry the rest into dad's bedroom and place on his bed. Now this memory brought back the next one.......Dad also had a coffee can next to the kitchen table with screws nails washers nuts and who knows what minus dirt and greasy something. Where at any point at dinner he would push his plate forward to middle of table grab said coffee can and spill some on table to look for what ever. I know I used that can many times myself when I wanted to hang something in my room. So then of course can my next memory......dad sitting at table drinking his tea......he would take tea bag out squeeze out all the water and tea and wrap string around bag then said is it open? One of us would check out garbage can and either say yes or no wait a sec while we removed the top. After giving the all clear dad would toss tea bag across table and into can yelling score! Some times he would try it with a paper towel most times that missed and one of us would have to pick it up and toss it where it belonged.
All these memories over a donut!
and to think he used that "DIRTY POCKET KNIFE TO CUT MINE" and in those days we didn't seem to notice or care!
As I sat there eating that donut the cat sleeping on my chest woke up and started grabbing for pieces of donut. I said "Hey you dumb cat donuts aren't good for cats!" But he kept trying to get some anyways.
And I didn't count on his paws being faster than my hands pushing him away as he managed to grab some right outta my mouth! and every single little piece that dropped on my shirt he snapped up like he hadn't eaten in 6 months.
After I was done I sat there thinking of all the times I ate one of those donuts with my dad.Most of the time I would be at work with dad and we'd share his lunch when we got to the donut he would pull out his pocket knife and cut the said donut in half and give me my half. Now in my memories of these times something flashed in my head..........that pocket knife!!!!!! OMG dad used that knife on everything. He would use it to gap the spark plugs on his car. He would scrap off the corrosion of the battery in the car. he would dig out slivers in his hand and or fingers he also would use it to pop open any thing that had pus in. good god the things he used that pocket knife for and for the most part all he did was take out his handkerchief and wipe it off and god only knows what he used the Handkerchief for!!!! Then the next memory that came for said pocket knife was the time I washed dads pants......I was standing in the basement and I was going through his pockets and I got to the one with his pocket knife in.....it had screws....nails....washers.....dirt.....greasy something......dirt..........pocket knife.....more dirt......saw dust........coin purse.....loose coins! I pulled it all out and put it all on the kitchen table we had in the basement just for this purpose and then dropped the pants into the washer. I then went over to dad's work bench and grabbed the bucket and carried it to the table. There I took out the coins and coin purse and his pocket knife and the rest I pushed into that bucket. I carried it back to dad's work bench so it was there next time he was down there working. I would put loose coins in my pocket and carry the rest into dad's bedroom and place on his bed. Now this memory brought back the next one.......Dad also had a coffee can next to the kitchen table with screws nails washers nuts and who knows what minus dirt and greasy something. Where at any point at dinner he would push his plate forward to middle of table grab said coffee can and spill some on table to look for what ever. I know I used that can many times myself when I wanted to hang something in my room. So then of course can my next memory......dad sitting at table drinking his tea......he would take tea bag out squeeze out all the water and tea and wrap string around bag then said is it open? One of us would check out garbage can and either say yes or no wait a sec while we removed the top. After giving the all clear dad would toss tea bag across table and into can yelling score! Some times he would try it with a paper towel most times that missed and one of us would have to pick it up and toss it where it belonged.
All these memories over a donut!
and to think he used that "DIRTY POCKET KNIFE TO CUT MINE" and in those days we didn't seem to notice or care!
Wednesday, January 02, 2013
I did what I set out to do
YOU KNOW WHEN YOUR A PARENT YOU TRY TO DO EVERY THING RIGHT BY YOUR CHILDREN. YOU DO THE TOOTH FAIRY THE EASTER BUNNY AND THEN SANTA. AND YOU TRY TO MAKE EVERYTHING MEMORABLE FOR YOUR KIDS.
WELL I GUESS IT DIDN'T WORK ON MINE.
SO WHEN I STARTED GETTING GRAND KIDS I THOUGHT OK HERE'S MY CHANCE AGAIN. A SECOND CHANCE IF YOU WILL. I HAD TWO OF OUR DAUGHTER'S BOYS LIVING WITH US FOR AWHILE WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG(actually I still have the oldest)
SO I DID ALL FOR THESE BOYS.........BUT AT CHRISTMAS I DID MY ALL I REALLY WENT ALL OUT......NOW I WENT ALL OUT FOR OUR KIDS TOO I DECORATED TO THE 9'S AS THEY SAY. I PLAYED THE CHRISTMAS SONGS AND SANG(badly if ya ask me) I TOOK THEM TO SEE SANTA. I TOLD THEM THE CHRISTMAS STORY AND THE STORY OF BABY JESUS.
I DID IT ALL.
AND WHEN THE KIDS AT SCHOOL TEASED THEM FOR BELIEVING IN SANTA I TOLD THEM NO MATTER WHAT YOU BELIEVE SANTA IS ALIVE AND WELL AND THAT SOME CHILDREN CAN'T BELIEVE BECAUSE OF THE WAY THEIR FAMILIES DO THINGS.
IN OTHER WORDS I MADE CHRISTMAS AS SPECIAL AS I POSSIBLY COULD.
WELL IT WORKED.
THIS YEAR JUST ON CHRISTMAS EVE MY OLDEST GRANDSON WENT TO HIS MOM'S TO BE WITH THEM CHRISTMAS MORNING. HE ASKED HIS LITTLE BROTHER WHO IS 5 "DO YOU KNOW WHO IS COMING TOMORROW NIGHT?" HE SAID "NO" MY OLDEST GRANDSON GOT UPSET. HE ASKED "DON'T YOU KNOW ABOUT CHRISTMAS?" HIS BROTHER SAID "NO"
SO HE ASKED"WHAT DO YOU THINK CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT?" AND HIS BROTHER SAID "STUFF I WANT"
MY OLDEST GRANDSON WAS SO UPSET HE ACTUALLY CRIED THEN CALLED ME AND SAID HIS LITTLE BROTHER KNEW NOTHING ABOUT CHRISTMAS OTHER THAN GIVE ME GIVE ME. AND HE SAID HE REMEMBERED WHEN HE WAS LITTLE HOW I MADE IT SO SPECIAL. HE SAID HIS MOM BLEW HIM OFF WHEN HE WANTED HELP TELLING HIS BROTHER ABOUT CHRISTMAS. SO I GOT INTO ACTION ......
I FOUND THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS COPIED IT SENT IT OFF TO HIS CELL FOR HIM TO READ TO HIS BROTHER. I FOUND THE CHRISTMAS STORY ABOUT JESUS AND SENT THAT TO HIM. I THEN SENT HIM THE LINK TO FIND THE CHRISTMAS SONGS AND SOME OF THE MOVIES BOTH ON YOU TUBE. THAT THEY COULD LISTEN TO AND WATCH TOGETHER. I ALSO SENT HIM THE LINK TO NORAD TO TRACK SANTA. THEN SAT BACK AND LET HIM HELP HIS BROTHER UNDERSTAND CHRISTMAS. THE NEXT DAY LITTLE MAN CAME TO ME AND ASKED DID I KNOW ABOUT CHRISTMAS THE REAL CHRISTMAS? I SAID "YES YES I DID" I SAID "WHO DO YOU THINK TOLD TJ AND AJ ABOUT IT?" HE LOOKED AT ME AND GOES" YOU?" AND I SAID" YES" THEN I TOLD HIM I TOLD HIS MOM AND HIS UNCLES TOO BUT I GUESS THEY FORGOT. HE TOLD ME HE LIKED THE STORIES AND THE SONGS AND HE LIKE THE JESUS STORY THE BEST.
I GUESS I DID MY JOB.
I REALLY TRIED TO MAKE SURE THEY REMEMBERED THE TIMES THEY SPENT WITH THEIR GRANDPARENTS AS GOOD TIMES AND NOW I KNOW THEY WILL REMEMBER CHRISTMAS WITH GRANDMA AS SPECIAL.
WELL I GUESS IT DIDN'T WORK ON MINE.
SO WHEN I STARTED GETTING GRAND KIDS I THOUGHT OK HERE'S MY CHANCE AGAIN. A SECOND CHANCE IF YOU WILL. I HAD TWO OF OUR DAUGHTER'S BOYS LIVING WITH US FOR AWHILE WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG(actually I still have the oldest)
SO I DID ALL FOR THESE BOYS.........BUT AT CHRISTMAS I DID MY ALL I REALLY WENT ALL OUT......NOW I WENT ALL OUT FOR OUR KIDS TOO I DECORATED TO THE 9'S AS THEY SAY. I PLAYED THE CHRISTMAS SONGS AND SANG(badly if ya ask me) I TOOK THEM TO SEE SANTA. I TOLD THEM THE CHRISTMAS STORY AND THE STORY OF BABY JESUS.
I DID IT ALL.
AND WHEN THE KIDS AT SCHOOL TEASED THEM FOR BELIEVING IN SANTA I TOLD THEM NO MATTER WHAT YOU BELIEVE SANTA IS ALIVE AND WELL AND THAT SOME CHILDREN CAN'T BELIEVE BECAUSE OF THE WAY THEIR FAMILIES DO THINGS.
IN OTHER WORDS I MADE CHRISTMAS AS SPECIAL AS I POSSIBLY COULD.
WELL IT WORKED.
THIS YEAR JUST ON CHRISTMAS EVE MY OLDEST GRANDSON WENT TO HIS MOM'S TO BE WITH THEM CHRISTMAS MORNING. HE ASKED HIS LITTLE BROTHER WHO IS 5 "DO YOU KNOW WHO IS COMING TOMORROW NIGHT?" HE SAID "NO" MY OLDEST GRANDSON GOT UPSET. HE ASKED "DON'T YOU KNOW ABOUT CHRISTMAS?" HIS BROTHER SAID "NO"
SO HE ASKED"WHAT DO YOU THINK CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT?" AND HIS BROTHER SAID "STUFF I WANT"
MY OLDEST GRANDSON WAS SO UPSET HE ACTUALLY CRIED THEN CALLED ME AND SAID HIS LITTLE BROTHER KNEW NOTHING ABOUT CHRISTMAS OTHER THAN GIVE ME GIVE ME. AND HE SAID HE REMEMBERED WHEN HE WAS LITTLE HOW I MADE IT SO SPECIAL. HE SAID HIS MOM BLEW HIM OFF WHEN HE WANTED HELP TELLING HIS BROTHER ABOUT CHRISTMAS. SO I GOT INTO ACTION ......
I FOUND THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS COPIED IT SENT IT OFF TO HIS CELL FOR HIM TO READ TO HIS BROTHER. I FOUND THE CHRISTMAS STORY ABOUT JESUS AND SENT THAT TO HIM. I THEN SENT HIM THE LINK TO FIND THE CHRISTMAS SONGS AND SOME OF THE MOVIES BOTH ON YOU TUBE. THAT THEY COULD LISTEN TO AND WATCH TOGETHER. I ALSO SENT HIM THE LINK TO NORAD TO TRACK SANTA. THEN SAT BACK AND LET HIM HELP HIS BROTHER UNDERSTAND CHRISTMAS. THE NEXT DAY LITTLE MAN CAME TO ME AND ASKED DID I KNOW ABOUT CHRISTMAS THE REAL CHRISTMAS? I SAID "YES YES I DID" I SAID "WHO DO YOU THINK TOLD TJ AND AJ ABOUT IT?" HE LOOKED AT ME AND GOES" YOU?" AND I SAID" YES" THEN I TOLD HIM I TOLD HIS MOM AND HIS UNCLES TOO BUT I GUESS THEY FORGOT. HE TOLD ME HE LIKED THE STORIES AND THE SONGS AND HE LIKE THE JESUS STORY THE BEST.
I GUESS I DID MY JOB.
I REALLY TRIED TO MAKE SURE THEY REMEMBERED THE TIMES THEY SPENT WITH THEIR GRANDPARENTS AS GOOD TIMES AND NOW I KNOW THEY WILL REMEMBER CHRISTMAS WITH GRANDMA AS SPECIAL.
Tuesday, January 01, 2013
THE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY
WELL I HAVE STARTED 2013 ON A CRAZY NOTE BUT ONE THAT MAKES ME HAPPY IF NOT CRAZY.
OUR DAUGHTER HAS 4 BOYS. AND EACH AND EVERY TIME THEY HAVE HAD THEIR VERY FIRST LOOSE TOOTH I'VE BEEN THERE TO PULL IT.
SO NOW IT WAS LITTLE MAN'S TURN. HE WILL BE 6 AT THE END OF JAN.
HIS SHOWED ME HIS FIRST LOOSE TOOTH JUST BEFORE THANKSGIVING. I TOLD HIM HOW I PULLED ALL 3 OF HIS OLDER BROTHERS VERY FIRST TOOTH, AND HOW I WANTED TO BE THE ONE TO PULL HIS FIRST LOOSE TOOTH.
WELL TODAY HE CAME AND SHOWED ME HIS VERY LOOSE TOOTH. I SAID ITS TIME.
SO GRANDMA GOT A PAPER TOWEL AND REACHED IN AND WELL WAS SUPER SURPRISED THAT IT JUST KINDA FELL OUT. IT BLED A LITTLE OF COURSE AND HE SAID HURT A LITTLE BUT I THINK IT WAS MORE THE SHOCK OF SEEING HIS TOOTH OUT THAN REALLY HURTING. SO NOW AS OF TODAY JAN 1ST 2013 I HAVE PULLED ALL 4 OF OUR DAUGHTER'S BOYS VERY FIRST LOOSE TOOTH. I AM SO PROUD.
I DON'T KNOW WHY IT WAS IMPORTANT FOR ME TO BE THE ONE TO PULL THEIR FIRST LOOSE TOOTH BUT IT REALLY WAS AND IM GLAD IT DIDNT FALL OUT BEFORE TODAY. SO TJ AJ JJ AND LJ HAVE ALL HAD THEIR FIRST LOOSE TOOTH PULLED OUT BY GRANDMA GAB!!!!
OUR DAUGHTER HAS 4 BOYS. AND EACH AND EVERY TIME THEY HAVE HAD THEIR VERY FIRST LOOSE TOOTH I'VE BEEN THERE TO PULL IT.
SO NOW IT WAS LITTLE MAN'S TURN. HE WILL BE 6 AT THE END OF JAN.
HIS SHOWED ME HIS FIRST LOOSE TOOTH JUST BEFORE THANKSGIVING. I TOLD HIM HOW I PULLED ALL 3 OF HIS OLDER BROTHERS VERY FIRST TOOTH, AND HOW I WANTED TO BE THE ONE TO PULL HIS FIRST LOOSE TOOTH.
WELL TODAY HE CAME AND SHOWED ME HIS VERY LOOSE TOOTH. I SAID ITS TIME.
SO GRANDMA GOT A PAPER TOWEL AND REACHED IN AND WELL WAS SUPER SURPRISED THAT IT JUST KINDA FELL OUT. IT BLED A LITTLE OF COURSE AND HE SAID HURT A LITTLE BUT I THINK IT WAS MORE THE SHOCK OF SEEING HIS TOOTH OUT THAN REALLY HURTING. SO NOW AS OF TODAY JAN 1ST 2013 I HAVE PULLED ALL 4 OF OUR DAUGHTER'S BOYS VERY FIRST LOOSE TOOTH. I AM SO PROUD.
I DON'T KNOW WHY IT WAS IMPORTANT FOR ME TO BE THE ONE TO PULL THEIR FIRST LOOSE TOOTH BUT IT REALLY WAS AND IM GLAD IT DIDNT FALL OUT BEFORE TODAY. SO TJ AJ JJ AND LJ HAVE ALL HAD THEIR FIRST LOOSE TOOTH PULLED OUT BY GRANDMA GAB!!!!
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